Get to Know Us on Competition
If we consider the number “2” as representing a technical aspect of playing a sport, we can refine these components and then combine them to achieve a predictable result, making 2+2=4. Winning occurs when we perform this assembly faster than our opponents; if they outpace us, we risk losing.
Players who enjoy long and successful careers often rely on one crucial non-technical skill: they recognize how everything links together in a nuanced, layered, intricate whole that only they can feel. This allows them to shape their own smooth, personal flow of relationships and connections. These inner adjustments, born from awareness and sensation, create the moments that shift momentum in the biggest moments.
While coaches focus on practicing the technical aspects necessary for winning, we provide opportunities for players to also train the one non-technical skill that top players and teams have. Combined coaches and players win games they have no right to win.
This approach holds additional value for older players. We don’t have to rely solely on our diminishing technical abilities from our youth. Understanding and utilizing the relationships of connections keeps the game engaging and enjoyable. And we can beat younger, faster players :)
Get to Know Us on Education
Today, most curriculum is derived from what is called backward design. Here are the basic steps:
Step 1: Identify what students should know and be able to do by the end of the learning cycle.
Step 2: Create an assessment to measure that learning.
Step 3: Plan a sequence of lessons that will prepare students to successfully complete the assessment.
While teachers take students through the steps to attain their learning goal, we train students to see how all their technical skills, from all their courses, link together as a nuanced, layered, intricate whole. Students learn to shape their own smooth, personal flow of relationships and connections to take their technical skills beyond attaining their learning objectives.
Get to Know Us on Authentic Relationships
Ok, men’s mental health, I am done with being told the sweeping generalisation that men don’t talk about their problems, so therefore, in simple, one-dimensional thinking, the solution must be for men to talk about their problems. It’s so surface-level it’s insulting. There are 2 huge incorrect assumptions about this. Talking about problems is always a good thing. It’s not always, because talking about it, with others going “me too” can just cement the idea that a bad situation can’t change. And, talking is not the only way to communicate. Silence helps sometimes. Also, solving a problem for others helps to stop negative thinking from becoming fixed. We - and I mean men and women - everyone - benefit from taking time to step outside of one-dimensional surface-level connections to have authentic, nuanced, intricate, layered, flowing connections
Step Beyond the Swipe
We train the non-technical skill top performers rely on the most—so your connections stay nuanced, intricate, layered waves of authentic relational flow
Experience authentic connections that can only be felt by ourselves and never wholly measured or coached by others.
We play basketball, have conversations, create music, and swim.
Let’s
Flow
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In 1994, I was a business analyst working out which parts of human relationships could be programmed into a product called Lotus Notes. Our early conclusion was stark: only interactions that could be quantified were suitable for digital adaptation. This meant focusing on social connections defined by the acceptance or rejection of presented content.
My path eventually led me to work with young people who experienced social connection largely through the lens of rejection. I dedicated myself to helping them see that genuine connection is far more nuanced than simply avoiding rejection—it’s about understanding and navigating the complexities of human interaction.
Years later, I encountered the work of Dr. Iain McGilchrist, which offered a profound lens through which to view the unintended consequences of our early explorations. In 1994, we couldn’t have foreseen the rise of the internet and mobile technology as we know them today. Now, connection—both online and offline—has often been reduced to a rapid-fire series of yes/no decisions: scrolling, swiping, accepting, and rejecting what’s placed before us.
The result is a kind of surface-level social cohesion, where our collective attention is fixed on acknowledging and accommodating differences. Even when common sense tells us that things aren’t working, that we need to change, we continue to focus on maintaining this fragile surface harmony. And so, we arrive at the world we inhabit today. A world where we lack the possibility of having connections that are nuanced, intricate, layered waves of relational flow. The solution could be as easy as attending events designed for authentic human connection.
St Albans, Hertfordshire, UK
We train the non-technical skill top performers rely on the most—so your connections stay nuanced, intricate, layered waves of relational flow
Step Beyond the Swipe
Experience authentic connections that can only be felt by ourselves and never wholly measured or coached by others.
We train the skills of authentic connections by experiencing them.
Basketball, Conversation, Music, Swimming
aboutus
The brain flourishes when its connections stay fluid. When they lock up, thinking gets stuck, and harm follows. While the harm is treated, we also need to remember the root cause and train the brain to stay authentic to its purpose. To keep all connections in a state of flow
The most notable drawback of our online social world is the significant decline in genuine connections that can only be felt, never wholly measured.
We find ourselves depending on logical reasoning, leading us to believe that everything is measurable. Consequently, we rationally conclude that there are no connections beyond measurement.
This perspective can cause us to view everything and everyone as a machine, capable of being automated. Although we intuitively sense that something vital is lacking, pinpointing it proves challenging.
What we truly miss are those connections that defy measurement. Such felt connections cannot be directly coached, as they resist complete quantification. Instead, we train the skills necessary to self-coach these elusive connections that can only be felt and never wholly measured. In this way, we avoid the negative effects of our online social world, without unplugging from it. After all, it is common sense that we are not machines.
The negative effect of our online social world is a drastic reduction in the connections that can only be felt, never wholly measured.
This reduction in connections that can only be felt and never wholly measured results in us only thinking in a rational way.
Rationally thinking, everything can be measured. There are no connections that can only be felt and never wholly measured. We live as rational machines, aware that something is missing, unsure of what that might be.
Rationally, everything will unfold as anticipated.
Rationally, all things and individuals should be classified.
Rationally, connection involves fulfilling the requirements of a specific category, defining our place within the broader system.
Rationally, we anticipate rejection if we do not consistently align with the expectations of our designated category.
Rationally, our bodies and minds function like machines that we should automate for ease and efficiency.
If we don't want this, we can train the relational skills for connections that can only be felt and never wholly measured.
LOOKUP!
By training players to reduce their dependence on quantifiable social interactions learned online, we practice forging genuine connections that can only be experienced and never fully quantified.
This significantly enhances players' capacity to engage in dynamic relationships of movement, creating layers of unfolding possibilities that reveal the optimum choice.
LOOKUP! Do something to counter the negative effects of our online social world
Put all attention on relational skills that can only be felt and never wholly measured.
Reduce any reliance on online social processes to have authentic human connections.
Resist being sucked into the idea that all social processes are online.
Prevent the online social world from disrupting our natural, authentic flow.
Until we have found them, we are never aware of the alternatives ways.
By training our ability to create flowing stepping stones of connections, we go beyond what we can engineer and meticulously plan for. To discover alternatives we are not yet aware of.
When we are in a state of flow, we don't have to push for results.
We shift our focus away from analyzing the mechanics.
Instead, we cultivate a richer comprehension of the relationships of connections between all things around us, and do something, pause, see what happened, and do it again as we generate timeless, effortless flow.
Performance is simply the result of allowing flow to happen so that something we could not have known before appears—a Wow moment.
We analyze what happened not for repetition, but to foster confidence that we can use flow to achieve better overall performance from the mechanical skills we already have.
What it feels like to be in flow.
Absolutely, it's like being in a river. When we try to control everything, it's as if we're trying to stop the river's flow. We might feel safe for a while, but we're actually cutting ourselves off from the life-giving current. On the other hand, when we're in a state of collapse, it's as if we've been swept away by the river. We're overwhelmed and scared, but we're also in the flow. We're part of something bigger than ourselves. We're connected to the world around us in a way we can't be when we're trying to control everything. So, the key is not to try to stop the river, but to learn how to swim in it. To trust in the flow and let it carry us. This doesn't mean we give up control completely. We still need to steer ourselves, to avoid the rocks and the dangerous currents. But we also need to let go, to trust in the flow, to be open to the unknown. That's where real life is. That's where hope is. That's where we find the strength to keep going, even when things are tough. Because we're not alone. We're part of the flow. And the flow is life itself. Flow is connection that is timeless and effortless.
Every Monday, we add the week's events.
THE IMPORTANCE OF FLOW
Absolutely, it's like being in a river. When we try to control everything, it's as if we're trying to stop the river's flow. We might feel safe for a while, but we're actually cutting ourselves off from the life-giving current. On the other hand, when we're in a state of collapse, it's as if we've been swept away by the river. We're overwhelmed and scared, but we're also in the flow. We're part of something bigger than ourselves. We're connected to the world around us in a way we can't be when we're trying to control everything. So, the key is not to try to stop the river, but to learn how to swim in it. To trust in the flow and let it carry us. This doesn't mean we give up control completely. We still need to steer ourselves, to avoid the rocks and the dangerous currents. But we also need to let go, to trust in the flow, to be open to the unknown. That's where real life is. That's where hope is. That's where we find the strength to keep going, even when things are tough. Because we're not alone. We're part of the flow. And the flow is life itself.
A LITTLE BIT ABOUT FLOW STATE TRAINING
It was previously believed that achieving a state of flow necessitated deep focus on the mechanics; however, this viewpoint is flawed. Flow is a vital aspect of the human experience; it isn't merely a state we enter but one we must train ourselves to avoid leaving.
Our aim is to cultivate a network of peer-reviewed flow state trainers to use activities like basketball, swimming, and conversation to help everyone train their flow and prevent technology from taking us out of flow.
The player development program for space and timing
Coaches have been peer-reviewed to have the space and timing skills to coach space and timing skills. They peer review players - by getting a sense of how many moving things a play can hold in their mental picture. And how long they remain open-minded as to which option they execute. A player with poor space and timing skills sees only one player in front of them. And think they have only one option that they must execute. A player with the highest level of space and timing skills - can hold a mental picture of where all players are on the court or pitch. And remains open-minded as to which of the rippling flow of options to execute - till the moment they execute one.
We need flow to adapt when a process is disrupted and when we to run different processes at the same time.
Process is about learning the parts…flow is a timeless, organic, and effortless experience where we fit fragments of those parts seamlessly together in different and unfolding ways, without the sensation of active thought. Performance is simply the result of allowing that to happen.
Training the flow state first requires us to stop doing what is dropping us out of flow. Because of the way the brain functions, learning a part of a process drops us out of flow. We need to stop learning parts of a process.
As flow comes back we train it by improving at an activity that requires us to operate several processes at the same time and/or has lots of disruption.
We observe how everything is in relationship with everything else. To see the whole.
We initiate a movement, and pause to take notice of how our action influenced the relationships between everything around us, adjusting accordingly. Repeat this process so that something we could not have known before appears—a Wow moment.
We analyze what happened not for repetition, but to foster confidence that we can use flow to get better performance from our existing process skills.
3 ways to join us
Attend our open-to-all community sessions, which operate on a pay-as-you-go basis. We also offer tailored sessions for your organization. Run charity events and help with recruitment.
1
Build participation and performance in sports and physical activity
The conventional sports coaching approach often focuses on pointing out shortcomings. However, by utilizing sports to teach the skills needed to create "Wow" moments, athletes can adapt traditional technical skills to match their individual talents and physical abilities. This method allows everyone to discover ways to enhance their performance, leaving them wondering why they hadn't tried it sooner.
Competition becomes a platform for celebrating performance. For sportsmanship. For enjoyment. For connection. For fun.
2
Grow audiences in sport
Beyond close circles like friends and family, viewers are not very keen on watching coaches pick players who simply follow instructions and execute a standard game plan flawlessly. To attract more viewers, we emphasize, capture, and share moments where players showcase something that leaves the audience amazed, making them question why they haven't seen it earlier – a real wow moment. This kind of excitement is what draws in wider audiences, and it's often what players want to deliver.
3
Break free from an addiction to certainty
When we feel anxious, it's often because we're unsure about the next steps and seek the comfort of a definite path. If we criticize ourselves for not achieving certainty, we might be clinging to the need for it. However, in a constantly evolving world, this reliance on certainty might not be beneficial. Shrinking our world to seek reassurance of certainty might seem comforting. However, isolating ourselves is not a fulfilling way to exist. Embracing the certainty that new experiences can bring might lead us to discoveries we previously overlooked. By acknowledging that these "wow" moments can guide us to positive outcomes, we can shift our focus from seeking certainty to creating memorable experiences.
Mixed, All-ability, All ages
Tran
We use sports to provide the experiences needed to shift cognitive skills for flawless execution of what we know to cognitive skills for crafting Wow moments
Players tailor standard technical skills to align with their unique talents, circumstances, and physical capabilities.
As players transition their cognitive skills they initiate actions without knowing the exact outcome, as teammates will synchronize their actions to craft something new, that leaves us wondering why we hadn't experienced it before. We share Wow moments. While the outcome of these Wow moments is uncertain, it is certain they lead us all to a good place.
4 reasons in life and sports to shift cognitive skills to crafting Wow moments
Crafting Wow moments involves breaking away from our usual routines to achieve set outcomes and embracing a serene sense of togetherness, equilibrium, tranquility, and awareness of our surroundings, to select a micro routine to execute. We take a moment to reflect on how this changed what is going on around us, then select and execute another micro routine, repeating this until we experience or witness something new, that leaves us wondering why we hadn't experienced it before. A Wow moment.
01
Building audiences and participation in sports
In the past decade, governing bodies have increasingly focused on enhancing standards. However, only those deeply involved are motivated by watching and trying to flawlessly execute standards.
When competition is about flawlessly executing a standard game plan we tend to get fierce coaches who only select atheletes who do as they are told. It creates a toxic environment.
As the former American national champion Jennifer Sey told Athlete A, the Netflix documentary on the Nassar scandal: “Emotional and physical abuse was actually the norm, and we were all so beaten down by that and made so obedient that when we knew there was a sexual abuser in our midst, we would never say anything.”
To attract more members and audiences governing bodies are introducing new rules and formats that introduce the element most wanted by audiences and players - Wow moments.
Athletes, coaches, and referees are are changing the cognitive foundations of a sport from those required to flawlessly execute standards to the skills to craft wow moments. Competition has become a platform for celebrating performance. For sportsmanship. For enjoyment. For fun.
02
Employment beyond AI
Leading organizations understand that future success depends on more than using AI to deliver certainty of outcome. They recognize the importance of people who possess the ability to craft new experiences that leave us wondering why we hadn't experienced them before. A Wow moment. While these Wow moments may be unpredictable, employers can be confident they will guide their organization toward success beyond AI and automated processes. Regrettably, many employees still need to correct deviations from established procedures, hindering their capacity to develop the cognitive skills needed to craft Wow moments. A similar challenge is observed in the education sector, where the emphasis on achieving high exam grades results in teachers and students spending a significant amount of time viewing deviations from expected outcomes as mistakes to be rectified. This approach prevents educators and students from developing the cognitive ability to craft Wow moments. Our objective is to assist employees and students in acquiring the cognitive skills necessary to craft Wow moments. We support employers in recruiting individuals with these capabilities.
03
Addiction to certainty
When we overly rely on our cognitive abilities to execute tasks flawlessly and we lack a clear plan to achieve a specific outcome, we often retreat and isolate ourselves. Moreover, when we question our capability to follow through with a plan, we may experience panic attacks and self-loathing for not meeting our own standards. This self-doubt can lead to isolation as we reject any assistance that doesn't guarantee a specific result. Our fixation on certainty becomes a form of addiction.
04
Experience inclusion as an opportunity to craft Wow moments
A need for things to be certain drives us to implement a strategy that guarantees everyone is included. Individuals who do not align with this strategy undermine the certainty of the outcome offered by everyone following the strategy. But, adapting the strategy to meet specific needs can unintentionally exclude those who currently benefit from it. It is not possible to have a strategy that gives everyone a certainty of fair inclusion. By focusing on crafting Wow moments, more diversity offers more opportunities for experiencing new things, prompting us to wonder why we hadn't explored them earlier. Embracing diversity opens up more chances for Wow moments. Wow moments can only lead us to good places. Our objective is to shift the idea of inclusion away from fair access to the same things towards differences giving everyone access to more wow moments. While the outcome of these wow moments is uncertain, it is certain they will lead us to good places.
In life and sports, the focus is moving from delivering certainty of outcome to the crafting of Wow moments.
As Artificial Intelligence does more of our routine tasks we think it's a good idea to shift our focus away from relying solely on our cognitive skills for performing routine tasks to developing the cognitive abilities to craft Wow moments.
In times of uncertainty, it's futile to pretend we can predict outcomes with certainty. However, we can trust in our skill to craft Wow moments, as we can be certain they will lead us to brighter destinations that are currently beyond our view.
Seek, find, and flow - coaching methodology
SkillsofWow.org is the governing body for those who coach the skills of Wow.